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To Speak, To Listen

by Eidola

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1.
Once again, here I am. On the precipice of breathlessness, my lungs collapse. I can’t escape the act. If I live in a city where they hunt me down, how long do you expect me to stay and wait to calibrate? If I bribe the committee with an offering, will they offer me commitment or calcify the magistrate? Because when I give in, I hope that I can be a better man in the end and carry on. But when you give up, then everything we’ve ever shared will self-destruct and tip the scale. Choose to prevail. If I live in a country where they propagate the wealth in corporate raids then who am I to speak? They forgive you of nothing, and they breed, and they breed, and they breed until they overstimulate the earth and feed upon the weak. Because when I give in, I hope that I can be a better man in the end and carry on. But when you give up, then everything we’ve ever shared will self-destruct and tip the scales. Choose to prevail. If I live in a world where a consciousness exists outside the walls of pain, ignorance, and habitual waste then I will stand on the edge of the earth as a monument to the greater good of man. To be born again.
2.
Tetelestai 04:56
Pull yourself together. You’re the only one that’s left getting blood from stone. I’m afraid that everyone listens in tongues, but I won’t give up. I won’t turn back. I can’t turn back. So I love until it hurts and every blessing feels just like a curse. What is subtle burns so slow and evolves in circles. Why are you afraid? The wind is your reprieve to endure. When you give yourself away, they will choose to believe the words you say. Don’t turn back. If you stay and help me cope, you’ll see me fly into the sun, into their vacant minds. To seal their fate. Time after time. So say that we’re not the same, and watch me prove you wrong again. You let me in. We live with his answers and still defy the truth is he left the work unfinished the day he died. Longing for rescue when push comes to shove. I frame a space reflected by his love between the lines. When you hide yourself away, they won’t believe a word you say. I am here to bring you closure. I won’t rest until you know yourself. I won’t turn back. I won’t give this up. You can’t turn back. You can’t give me up, but if you remember divine sequence, I will return.
3.
Open your mind. Accept the friction. All of our lives are an addiction. Deep within the earth is where we’re birthed. Genetics in decline. It’s all in how you survive. I know that every time I try (reduction expansion engage the transaction) I lose myself at the bottom line. This fear of destruction (breakthroughs from broken backs) is the nature of my design. I know that one day I’ll be bitter (our will is deserving our pockets still burning) and the only one to blame, but you can rest assured (conviction's what you lack) I’ll show you all their is to see. Fabricate slander. To live is to pander. With dismay empower; Consumer devour. Misuse of talent divided the planet, corrupted the balance, and left us in the filth. Like you never wanted this. Because I never wanted this. I’m in the enterprise of versatility. Calculate the weights and measures. Fate exceeds probability when I take no investment lightly. As you stack your greed from wall to wall, you let your wealth devolve. It’s all in how you survive. I know that every time I try (reduction expansion engage the transaction) I lose myself at the bottom line. This fear of destruction (breakthroughs from broken backs) is the nature of my design. I know that one day I’ll be bitter (our will is deserving our pockets still burning) and the only one to blame, but you can rest assured (convictions what you lack) I’ll show you all there is to see. Break down the walls of my mistakes. We dug our graves for none but us to lay. Oh you depraved; have you no couth? An eons wrath of hell to pay. We built our homes so we could run away. To what end will you go to cover up the lies you’ve sewn? I can’t stand the thought of becoming everything I’m not and pretending all my problems come from somewhere that’s outside of my own head. I’d rather be fed to the pigs. Let my bones be a vestige of excess, of secrets, of flames and fear, of progress, of sequence, of less is fair.
4.
Querents 04:08
I talk to myself in my sleep. Lucid walk through the doorway to watch her dance along the tapestries. Cascade dreams. But the man who dreamt the dreamer isn’t me. I’ve been waking up just to see the sun glisten for the hierophant and fall away. I’ve waited my whole life and given up my selfish hands, that built this all, to hear you say you know my name. I give my mind to leave you with something more than psalms and antiquated anecdotes. I give my body to the bedlam of this schema we call transition to find the origin of our past transgressions. I’ve been waking up just to see the sun glisten for the hierophant and fall away. I’ve waited my whole life and given up my selfish hands, that built this all, to hear you say you know my name. There’s wisdom in the water when you drink it from the grail. The magician's blessed with providence, but a fool can never fail. Your fate can be adjusted if you have a soul to sell, but if the world is an illusion then the empress hides the veil. When elation takes its toll on me, libration allows my soul to plant a seed. I’ve been waking up just to help the chariot carve a way for every age who plays this game. This game I still choose to play. I’m not waiting my whole life for someone to save me when I’ve already saved my self from the dark. I seek the light to find you again.
5.
Anomaly. Conformity. Entheat decode the great machine. Departure from consistency of dogmatic assimilation. They’re lost in misology, and I can’t relate to the nescient train of thought. So, omnierudite, are you here to watch the world burn in compurgation or contrition? I’ve seen it so many times before. No love. Just careless communication. To reprocess counterfeit meaning in who we are when all is one. All that’s ours is what you want. It is non-existent. Inclination. A conscious separation. So controlling. It pulls me closer. The path I choose to walk, it is self-consistent. Circumstances. Ends that take no chances. Adaptation. Human fabrication. Until I see the end. They’ve taken away our lives and our ability to separate what’s real in all the lies and false beliefs. The machines have taken all I’ve ever known. They’ve taken away our eyes and our ability to think and feel alive. I feel all of my thoughts devolve. The machines have taken all I’ve ever know. Breathe in. Bring me close and watch my eyes. Concentrate. Don’t turn away. Breathe out. This could be our way out now. Normality. Incongruity. Entheat decode the great machine. Convergence of variation, of singularity assimilation. Free yourself in constant motion. No surprises. No devotion. Awake. Protest the monolith, or let this be the end.
6.
Loti 04:56
In my youth, I felt the earth move underneath my feet. I knew my place and kept time blissfully out of harms reach. But time takes its toll and makes fools of the beggars, hardens all hearts with desired endeavors. Shell games, all routine in repose. I grew tired of hiding in this shelter I built of small empty promises and traces of silt. I built it all up for so long it was only a matter of when I’d find out I was wrong and learn to let go. I was told I could be anything I wanted to be, but conflicting opinions have led me to see I was born to be everything you’ve seen in your dreams, a catalyst of providence, a glitch in the seams. It’s not right, but it’s what you need. Now my past is not the residence I choose to reside, and my future's just a context, ephemeral, implied. It’s not you. It’s not me. It’s now and everything in between. And that’s why I harbored the will to keep moving my feet. That’s why these calloused lungs are the only way I know how to speak. So where are you now? And where were you when you were me? Have I proven anything? Or traveled full circle again? Because I know how much I’ve grown, and the world is not a bitter place despite what you’ve shown. I will become everything that you said I could not and be there for everyone that you forgot. I will lead the way back home.
7.
Do you seek out a teacher? A vagrant man who roams the Danxia in search of ancient eyes? Well don’t be surprised if that affair proves to be nothing more than vaticide. Do you see yourself as a preacher? A man who doles out consequence for a God fit to be tied as the path intwined grows cold and dim inside the labyrinth of the mind. Take a step back. Breathe in the golden air and let your notions go. Tracing lineage through the wrists of kings to find room to expand on how we came to be. A history through the rings of trees. Now I’ve heard you need a savior. Just tell me that it’s anyone but me. The greatest divide has never been kind to anyone who tries to conquer pride. Destroy, rebuild every city, every culture, every monument until we’re constant and loved. Like a child in the arms of impermanence. Like Siddhartha handing you the torch. And I see your faith in us. Do you see my faith in us? You lit the flame. Fate flows through me. Tell me your name. Whisper softly. When patience defies your art, take root in our hallowed souls. Kings of kings and ghosts of man. Whisper softly. Tell me your name. Whisper softly.
8.
The Familiar 03:24
Starved for the light, sleepless dream of mine. Conjure me. Cast a circle. Rouse my soul. Say my name. I don’t want this grace if the meaning is empty. I only want to sing if it wakes your mind. I don’t want to hurt if the pain yields no progress. I only want to grow if it means I’ll be whole. But if I’m just as lost, strike my name from the books. Burn the sage. Tear out the page. Let history remind us of everything that I’ve done with this devil on my back(erase the blame forget the shame.) It keeps me intact. Conjure me. Cast a circle. Rouse my soul. Say my name. I could die with my fears exposed, or I could change the way I think, the way that I perceive. Be honest with my honesty. Learn a lesson through a different system. Reincarnate. Post-optimistic. I sold my soul for a sense of self control. Heaven and hell, both what we make of them (if I have a heart then take it.) If it’s God sent then take it, or be taken aback. But if I’m just as lost, strike my name from the books. Burn the sage. Tear out the page. Let history remind us of everything that I’ve done with this devil on my back (erase the blame forger the shame.) I’m closer now than I have ever been.
9.
One sacrifice for another, or were we made to suffer and work our hands to bone? The vultures will circle my thoughts above. Inferno. Gate keeper, have I paid my penance and sacrificed enough for you to help me ascend, or will you seal my fate in your father’s blood? Break the seal. Blasphemy! Codex Gigas, lead me to my venerable devices. Alchemy! Wormhole through a time once witless and unrefined. To labor endlessly in the holy womb. Birth after rebirth. Doubt is failure’s most cleaver disguise, but I’m no stranger to deceit. When the substrate is disgraced, then our time has come to exalt the maker. I’m starting to believe the path is flawed a paradigm. I'm starting to believe we're on our own.
10.
Blessed and graceful. Like a copacetic art connected from the start by the meek and faithful, that comprise our counterparts and set us apart. Awake. Find your faith or supplicate your god what you lack. A ten fold collapse. I will cast aside a thousand times the meek and the poor. Is it all done? Before it's begun? If death comes to take me before I deserve, let it be known that I loved and I searched for a way to be holy, a reason to be kind, a place for us to live in the hearts of mankind. I was weak. I was humble. I was human. But I grew formidable and became impregnable. I wanted everything, so I took all the weight I could carry on my shoulders to build you a home, a place where you’re never alone. Brick by brick. A house made together. A place in forever. Wall to wall. Here through it all. I'm blessed to recall a place where you're never alone. Wake up. We've always known how things have to be. Your mind is steady with resolve, and yet your hands are still shaking. Can you see how we ended up here? You never shuddered at the idea of protecting what you love, but I didn't fully consider the means to the end. Can you still see the path laid before you? We've been fathers and thieves, killers and kings, yet still my faith waivers at the thought of choosing to become what you know I must. When the difference between a murderer and a savior is in the eye of the beholder, will you still be able to see the blood on your hands? We all know who's to blame. Can you see how this is all the same? We've seen this act play out through a thousand different eyes, and every time I've been sure you're in the right. When you close your eyes, do you dream of a place where you can finally sleep again? Can you still see the blood on my hands? Wait. Speak. Listen. You'll know we've been here before. Wake up. And I’ve lived in every voice that permeates stillness and resonates calm in the face of every choice. I imbue clarity. And I’ve died; I’ve been reborn. I’ve seen many pious men give their lives for idol wars. If there’s one thing that I know for sure, I’ll make my way from this grave.
11.
Apostasy in latency. No enemies. No legacy. Oh God, I fear this could be the last time we see ourselves in this light, and I need to know what makes you whole. There's no looking backwards while we feed each other's guilt. The questions stopped with motion. A life spent retreating further through this desert. Seek the heretic abroad. Dare to drink the river. The same mistakes don't bear repeating. It’s all I want and all that I need. Will I regret it all and replace the blame? When you’re all I want and all that I need, will you resent it all and cast me out again? I'm cast away. I’m out of place. Far from home. Nowhere known. All hail logic; echo nostalgic. Contact. Caught in the rye. Blinded by time. Just keep breathing. Just keep feeling lost until you find your way back home. They’ll say we’ve come so far just to turn it into something they won’t understand, until they reach out when they’ve suffered enough. Have you suffered enough? Is it time to move on? Because I need this, like you need this too (I'll carry the weight for you). We will break. We will falter. We will mend blood in water. We will choose not to speak if our words are conceit. We will think. We will seek. We are one.
12.
When you become me, you’ll finally see these people are blind to the greater disease. We’re both tempting time with our souls on demand. You can’t erase a weathered past. You can’t maintain the master’s hand. Lay your eyes on these things your father’s have built, these bridges and buildings connecting. Their mothers before them exempered from the guilt of generations intersecting. Will we find a way to get it right this time? I’ve spent my nights awake, expecting you to come and help me find my way back home to the center intertwined. To the answer I can’t find. To the Pharaoh, the Pariah sings again. When you become me, you’ll finally see these people are blind to the greater disease. We’re both tempting time with our souls on demand. You can’t erase a weathered past. You can’t maintain the master’s hand. How do we heal with the alchemists in such a cynic state of mind this time? What do we build when the architects have slaved themselves away for greed or God? How do we grow? One for the lost and zealous. One for the blind who don’t believe. One for the dharma of mankind. (Sahasrana, I need you now.) Say, say that you’ve brought the rain to end this drought. Sift through the lies. See through the doubt. Say, say that you brought the rain to end this drought. Sever the ties. Sift through the doubt. Say, say that you brought the rain to end my pain. Cancel my eyes. See through the clouds. As the first drop falls from your grace to the ground.

about

To Speak, To Listen is presented by:

Andrew Wells - Vocals, Guitar
Matt Dommer - Guitar, Vocals
Brandon Bascom - Guitar
James Johnson - Bass
Matt Hansen - Drums

credits

released June 2, 2017

All songs and lyrics written, performed, and recorded by Eidola
Produced, Engineered, Mixed, and Mastered by Dryw Owens
Illustrations by Glenn Thomson
Art design and Layout by Bailey Zindel at Halfheart Media
Photo by Michael-Rex Carbonell
Published by Blue Swan Records

Guest Vocals on "Amplissimus Machina" by Joey Lancaster
Group Vocals on "Tetelestai" by Andrew Wells, Dryw Owens, Joey Lancaster, and Matt Coate
Saxophone on "Houses Movement III: Rust/Rebuild" by Nicholas Pope

Eidola would like to thank:
All of our friends and family, Will Swan, Dryw Owens, Kathrine Owens, Hans, Sergio Medina, Donovan Melero,
Michael-Rex Carbonell, Glenn Thomson, Bailey Zindel, Joey Lancaster, Matt Coate, Josh Unnitt, Michael Franzino, Chad Cooper, Stolas, Hail The Sun, Artifex Pereo, A Lot Like Birds, Dance Gavin Dance, and Belle Noire

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Eidola Provo, Utah

Eidola is a five piece experimental post-hardcore band from Salt Lake City, UT. To Speak, To Listen out now.

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